Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)

Nóg beter is Some like it Hot...

Some like it hot is een klassieker die nog door mij gezien moet worden....

Tony Curtis

Noem maar eens een grap uit het hele oeuvre van Robin Williams die beter is dan de slechtste grap uit The Big Lebowski....:P

Dat wordt zoeken.....

Nee...als je het oeuvre van Robin Williams niet kent slaat het werkelijk nergens op....;-)

Ik heb eventjes gezocht en ben toch aardig tegengekomen dat ik leuker vond.....

(sorry voor het lang bericht maar mooie/goede teksten zijn niet in te korten). Dan nog, dit is maar een klein gedeelte van wat ik ervan had KUNNEN maken.

- I wonder what chairs think about all day...."Oops, here comes another asshole!".

- [Mrs. Doubtfire] Carpe dentum. Seize the teeth

- [Mrs. Doubtfire] Ah, a boy. I don't work with the males, because I used to be one!

- [Mrs. Doubtfire] My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flashes.

- Michael Jackson's claiming racism, I'm like "Honey, you gotta pick a race first!"

- [Singing] Woke up in the morning/ And my stocks were gone!/ The Enron-Ron Run, The Enron Run!

- [Singing] Oh Kenny Boy! The Feds, the Feds are calling!

- [As Ethel Mermen] I like big butts! I don't know why!

- The poor Canadian snowboarder, in the 1998 Olympics, they took away his medal because he tested positive for marijuana, which is kinda redundant number one, number two, they said that marijuana was a 'performance-enhancing drug.' EEEEHHH.

[buzzer sound] Marijuana enhances many things, colors, shapes, sensations, but you are not fucking empowered. When you're stoned, you're lucky if you can find your own goddamn feet! The only way it's a performance-enhancing drug is if there's a big fucking hershey bar at the end of the run.

- Every so often, Donald Rumsfeld steps up and says, "I don't know where...I don't know when...But something awful is gonna happen...that's it, that’s all for today. No further questions!"

- [About ice-skating] Cut the foreplay, let's have ice fucking!

- Why get your tongue pierced? And she says, "To enahthe the thekthual thtimulathon!"

- And you can't bomb the Afghanis back to the stone age because they'll think, "Upgrade! Fuck!"

- And if you are in a jihad and you kill an infidel (which, I'm sorry to say, is all of us) and you yourself die, you will go up to the gates of heaven where you will be greeted by seventy-one dark-haired virgins. But the Koran scholars tell us that the actual translation is "71 Crystal-Clear Raisins"...slight difference of interpretation, really!

- I can see it now: Osama bin Laden goes up to the pearly gates where George Washington comes out, starts beating him and is then joined by 70 other members of the Continental Congress. Osama will say, "Hey, wait! Where are my 71 virgins?" And George will reply "It's 71 Virginians, you asshole!"

- Osama Bin-Ladin is a six foot tall Arab on dialysis...why is that so fucking hard to find?

- This is Enron Field, we were gonna call it Fifth Amendment Field...We can't call it "We're Fucked" Field.

- For the Last Supper, would they not have gone out for Chinese? I think so.

- Of course Jesus was Jewish! Thirty, living at home with his parents, his mother thought he was God's gift, he's Jewish, give it up!

- Not like the tits in Vegas where even God is going "I didn't make those!"

- I have a solution for the pledge of allegiance. How about "one nation, under Canada, above Mexico"? Yeah, but then we'll have to do all the anthems like

[singing] "someone blessed America". On the dollar bill, instead of "in God we trust"... "in Gates we trust". "Mr. Gates, when did you realize you were creating a monopoly?" "Monopoly's just a game, Senator. I'm trying to control the fucking world."

- This whole winter was so bizarre! The temperatures were like "80, 20, 30, 50". The weathermen are going "I don't know what's fucking going on! Let's just wait and see." The spring flowers are like Anne Heche going, "I'm in, I'm out, I'm in, I'm out."

- I know there's a cure for bio terrorism or whatever it is, and I know it lies within Keith Richards. He is the only man on the planet who can go "Anthrax?"

[sniffs] All RIGHT..." Keith is the only man who can make the Osbornes look fucking Amish.

[On people who "go to boxing to see the sport of boxing"]

- That's like saying, "I go to stock car races to see people take left turns all day." You go to boxing to see somebody get the FUCK beaten of them!

- The entire world will be in nuclear war, and only the Swiss will be going, "Vhat's that noise?"

- [on Lance Armstrong] And every year the French go, "He is on chemicals!" And I'm going, "It's chemotherapy, you little toad suckers!" "Okay, he has one testicle, he's aerodynamic! Everyone, cut off your balls! You'll be quicker! Do it! Don't be afraid!"

[On his hairiness]

I've had people walk to me and yell, "Fur is murder!" Please! It's me! I look like a fucking chimp!

- God gave man a penis and a brain. And only enough blood to run one at a time.

- [As George Bush] "Many of our imports come from other countries." No shit!

- It doesn't scare me that W waved at Stevie Wonder; That's OK. What scares me is that W almost died from a fucking pretzel!

- People are suing Miss Cleo for fraud. I'm like, "fucking duh!" It’s like buying har-care products from Cher. She is wearing a wig you idiot!

- [On "The Luge," a winter sport] What drunken, German gyneacologist invented this sport? What guy went, "I want to dress like a sperm, shove an ice skate up my ass, and ride balls first down an ice chute. Ya. That would be fun!" ?

- [On "The looney," Canada's currency]

How can you take an economic crisis seriously? “The Looney is down” [as Daffy Dick] “Oh, how sad for you!”

-[On the not-so-hardcore security on the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco]

At one end, a Hummer and two National Guardsmen, at the other end, a Hummer and two National Guardsmen. The problem is that the Hummer and the National Guardsmen are wearing jungle camouflage. For those of you who have never been to San Francisco, the bridge is bright orange. I just feel like going: [as Elmer Fudd] Be very, very quiet. We're wooking for tewwowists. He He He He He He He.

- You have to remember, John Ashcroft is a man who LOST to a dead man in Missouri. And people would go: ”I’m sorry John, but the dead man scares me less than you do”

- You're saying the Oscars are also political, OH FUCK OFF!!!

SHH!! There is a gay maffia!!! SHH!! with a fairy Godfather saying "DOES THIS PISTOL MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG!"

- I have a plan, it's an interesting plan. It's called a timeshare, like Miami, let's try that. Jews will get Hannukah and Passover, Christians will get Christmas and Easter, and Muslims will get Rammadan and that other holiday, Kaboom! Now...obviously, the people in the lawyers section for HBO are going "Oh, fuck off! What are you doing, you asshole!"

- Soon Bill Gates will have something called Total Information Technology, TIT!!! and when your sucking on the TIT, I’ve got you by the motherboard!!!

I know the defenition of retardation in Texas, its pretty WIDE!!

- Now we get to see Tanya Harding fight Paula Jones in an all white trash weekend. Yeah! It's not the end of civilization, but you can see it from there!

- [On Mike Tyson biting somebody]

I'm saying "You're lucky he just bit somebody! Mike just got out of prison; you're lucky he didn't FUCK him!"

- [On the Irish] Not only will you kick my ass, but you'll sing about it, afterwards. "Oh, the night you said my wife was fat, I knocked you down and shit in your hat!"

- Thank you for the standing ovation! We've had the orgasm up front, let's have a cigarette, let's relax!

- [commenting on 9/11] When this whole thing happened, I thought the Statue of Liberty would change. Instead of "Give me your tired and your poor," it would be her with a baseball bat going "You want a piece of me!"

- If ya want a linguistic adventure, go drinkin' with a Scotsman. 'Cause ya couldn't fucking understand them before...

[commenting on President George W. Bush]

You look at Bush, and you realize, it's Bush 2.0, ok? He's a vaguer release, he came with certain bugs in the software, alright? He'll go, "This country will not be taken hostile - whoops, delete, delete - hostage. Okay." And then you look at him and you realize he does have a short attention span. He'll be going, "Our economy is go--oh, look at the kitty."

- [commenting on the Swiss]

Ya! The nice Germans! Or, as they call themselves, "the other white race."

-[commenting on airport and plane security]

- Now, you can't even take a nail-clipper on a plane. What, are they afraid you're gonna go "ALRIGHT! Hand over the plane or the bitch loses a cuticle! I have a nail file! I can be irritating!"

- [on Afganistan] And then we drop BOMBS...food....FOOD...bombs...and, here's the fun part: some of the bombs were little yellow bombs...and the food packages were little yellow packages. So now you're playing "Survivor: The Real Game."

And what was in those packages? Pop-Tarts, peanut butter, and all you need is a honey-baked ham and you'll have a Redneck Christmas.

-Congress recently approved the covert plan to assassinate Saddam Hussein. So what they've done is PUBLICLY approve the secret plan to assassinate Hussein. I wonder if he knows?

- [commenting on terrorists]

We're dealing with fundamentalists...the Amish are fundamentalists, but they don't try and hijack a carriage at needlepoint. And, if you're ever in Amish country and you see a man with his hand buried in a horse's ass, that's a mechanic. Remember that.

- Gandhi didn't have his own line of products, he didn't have 'Gandhi Jeans', whether you're not eating or simply telling the English to get the fuck out, 'Gandhi Jeans', come in sizes one and below.

- New Yorker's are back to normal again. For a while they were all like "are you ok", but now it's back to the cab drivers going "have a nice day ASSHOLE... fuck you my friend enjoy your day.

- [On soccer] Everyone plays it! Not like baseball, 'cause the French don't have a baseball team! If they did, [with French accent] they would only have left field and no one would be safe!

- [as Nicholson] To be or not to goddamn be.

- [as Stallone] To be…..or what?

- [Good Will Hunting] Son of a bitch, you stole my line.

- [to the amature Porn guy in OHP] You want little more pink?

- [during OUTSIDE concert in Lake Tahoe there was buzzing still-unknown machine] What’s that noise? “It’s the air-conditioning Mr. Williams.” Oh, really….

- [Good Morning, Vietnam] Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how the V.P. is such a V.I.P., shouldn't we keep the P.C. on the Q.T.? 'Cause of the leaks to the V.C. he could end up M.I.A., and then we'd all be put out in K.P.

- [the Birdcage] I’m in hell and there’s a crucifix in it.

- When you go to neverland you have to be this high to ride Michael.

- [Q: What took you from Chicago to Detroit] A plane.

- [about his middle-name Mc Laurim] That’s Irish. And then I’m also welsh, which means every time so often I have to occupy myself.

[Good Morning, Vietnam] You are in more dire need of a blowjob than any white man in history

[Good Morning, Vietnam] Hey, we're back. That last two seconds of silence was Marcel Marceau's newest hit single, "Walkin In The Wind." And now, here are the headlines. Here they come right now. Pope actually found to be Jewish. Liberace is Anastasia and Ethel Merman jams Russian radar. The East Germans, today, claimed the Berlin Wall was a fraternity prank. Also the Pope decided today to release Vatican-related bath products. An incredible thing, yes, it's the new Pope On A Rope. That's right. Pope On A Rope. Wash with it, go straight to heaven. Thank you.

- [impersonating an Intelligence Officer] We've realized that we're having a very difficult time finding the enemy. It is very difficult to find a Vietnamese man named "Charlie." They're all named Nguyen, or Doh, or...[as himself] Well, how are you going about it? [as Intel Officer] Well, we ask people and say, 'Are you the enemy? And, whoever says “yes”, then we shoot them."

[Dead Poets Society] Phone call from God.... Now if it had been collect, it would have been daring!

- You can fool some of the people some of the time and jerk the rest off.

You know, life’s like a big van, and sometimes the kaka hits it!

- You want to kiss me? You want to share my diseases?

- [on Prince Charles] You look at the teeth and the ears…something must’ve gone wrong.

- Can we get an Amen right now? [audience: “Amen!”] Can we get a woman too ‘cause we gotta be equal always.

- [as Bush] Most of our imports come from other countries [as himself] Yeah, no shit!

- Two jews walk into a bar……

- [Q: Is comedy genetic? Can it be learned, can it be taught?] Well, look at what our studies have shown. As we see the historical roots of comedy...You see the beginning where there's a group of cro-magnons, looking at a group of Neanderthalers, saying "How many Neanderthalers does it take to light a fire?" The answer is none...they don't have it.

- [Fathers´ Day] I wrote this musical called "Hello, Doctor, it's Still Swollen." It had a great opening, went like this: "Hello Mr. Colon, my prostate's feelin' swollen. I think that things are flowin' not so well. I'm feelin' kinda heinus cause there's something in my..."

- [Fathers´ Day] You know, Scott, when I was your age I was pulling on myself harder than a tractor pulling Arkansas.

- [Bicentennial man] Why don´t blind people go skydiving? It scares their dogs.

- [The Birdcage] You do an eclectic celebration of the dance! You do Fosse Fosse Fosse Fosse Fosse! You do Martha Graham Martha Graham Martha Graham, or Twyla Twyla Twyla, or Michael Kidde Michael Kidde Michael Kidde Michael Kidde, or Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna... but you keep it all inside.

- [The Birdcage] I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. I mean, I walk in the door and there's a woman in my bed!

- [Nine Months] You have a girl. Unless I cut the wrong cord

- [Hook] You're a--you're a complex Freudian hallucination having something to do with my mother and I don't know why you have wings, but you have very lovely legs and you're a very nice tiny person and what am I saying, I don't know who my mother was; I'm an orphan and I've never done drugs because I missed the sixties, I was an accountant.

- [Patch Adams] IDGARA: I don´t give a rats ass!

- When you create, al off a sudden you get a little endorphin buzz. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?

- [on Police on Hollywood] STOP! Those shoes don´t go with those pants.

- [on Police in New York] STOP! Ok, go on again.

- [on Police in the UK] The police has no gun and you don´t have a gun so they´ll be going like: “ STOP! Or I´ll say stop again.”

- [on Nuclear weapons] China has the bomb. Or maybe not, maybe they have just 1 billion people go boom.

The French have a bomb too. Maybe just a Michelin bomb….it only destroys restaurants under 4 stars.

- [French accent] I´m giving a cigarette to a baby, does that make you angry?

- [2 empty seats on the 1st row] These people are obviously not coming, huh? Paid good fucking money and now they don´t show up. Or is this for the Bush twins?

- [as Bush] Most of our imports come from other countries [himself] No shit!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST EN ZEER TOEPASSELIJK! DEZE LAATSTE WAANZINNIGE QUOTE!

- Another thing I got is a sensk of humiligration. Now, maybe you swabs can pool your intelligensk and sees that I'm axking you for an apologeky.

Had je niet gewoon de Quote-link van zijn laatste show kunnen tonen?

Zo heb je imho weer zo'n onnodig lange post.

1 - 0 voor Linda

Jaja...zegt degene die Dead Poets Society op nummer één heeft staan in zijn top tien...

Ik wacht dus vanzelfsprekend op tegengas van Tovenaar, Mik, Jarre en Boule,.....

komt deze niet op hetzelfde neer?

Ik zal er even een quote tegenaan gooien van Dhr. Pacino: "Don't waste my motherfucking time!!

m.a.w. ik heb hier geen zin meer an. Het werkt toch niet....

Sorry Pjotr, misschien kunnen Tovenaar en Boule meer goesting vinden.

Hmm, ik zie nog steeds geen grap die beter is dan een grap uit de Big L, ben niet overtuigd. En meer ga ik er ook niet aan verspillen.

Helaas, Tovenaar wil ook niet meer .. Nu maar duimen voor Linda dat Boule nog iets heeft,... ik geef d'r weinig kans

Yeah baby!! I got them speechless! Eindelijk.

Damn, wat was toch weer een goeie actie

En voor Tovenaar kan ik wel nog zo´n rits quotes tevoorschijn halen, maar aangezien ik iedereen overtuigd heb (ja, jou ook, alleen wil je het niet toegeven ), heb ik niet de behoefte weer een beroep te doen op jullie lachspieren

Wat een overwinning..

Verder vind ik het wel een beetje offtopic.

It's a dirty job but......(snel voordat Jordy de hele handel in een ander topic plaatst....:) )

Even wat kwaliteit ipv kwantiteit.....

Walter Sobchak: You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.

The Dude: Yeah, but Walter...

Walter Sobchak: Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon...with nail polish.

The Big Lebowski: Isn't that what makes a man?

The Dude: Mmm, sure. That and a pair of testicles.

[While dunking the Dude's head in the toilet.]

Thug: Where's the money, Lebowski? Where's the fucking money, shithead?

The Dude: It's uh... uh... it's down there somewhere, let me take another look.

en nog eentje dan.......

Jesus Quintana: You ready to be fucked man? I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios mio, man. Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.

The Dude: Yeah, well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.....

ik begin me een beetje te ergeren aan het feit dat the big lebowski hier door velen ruecksichtslos (ja dat staat er) wordt gepositioneerd als beste komedie ooit.. en als iemand een andere type humor leuk vindt, komt men met uitdagingen als: laat eens zien dat het beste citaat uit die film beter is dan de slechte uit TBL. beetje arrogant is dat op z'n zachtst gezegd.

Over kwantiteit en kwaliteit ga ik niet in discussie, iedereen vind daar zo het zijne/hare van.

Maar orginaliteit! WOW!

en ik begin me een beetje te ergeren aan mensen die doelbewust off-topic discussies beginnen, en het feit dat ze daarmee mods aan het werk zetten niet belangrijk vinden

Volgens mij is er niemand in deze topic die dat gezegd heeft (misschien enkel impliciet ). Ik vind het vreemder dat sommige mensen Mrs. Doubtfire als de beste film ooit bestempelen... vind het best een aardige film, maar uiteindelijk is het toch een soort Tootsie remake. Daarbij is naar mijn mening de humor in TBL een stuk origineler, en veel mensen houden nou eenmaal van originaliteit (dat bleek een paar reacties eerder ook weer ).

Vind je dat niet een beetje overdreven? Dit is ook een vorm van humor. Vond het wel een mooie uitdaging, en gezien de reactie heeft ze daar veel plezier aan beleefd.

hmmm, zie dat ik hier nog niet op gestemd had... het is toch een beetje een one-mans-show die williams opvoert. enkele aardige grappen, over een cliche onderwerp. maar dat het cliche is was al duidelijk. ik vind williams best een leuke komiek, maar niet meer dan dat. aangezien de film door zijn 'talent' voor komiek gedragen dient te worden vind ik nu ik dit stukje tik, de 2,5 sterren die ik net heb gegeven alweer teveel en maak ik er 2 van. nu niet meteen weer in hongerstaking gaan of zo linda

ik weet niet of je het tegen mij hebt, maar deze discussie was al veel eerder off-topic!

Die staking was puur vanwege het feit dat men MIJ niet met rust konden laten wat mijn stemegdrag betreft. Heb de kritiek op Robin die je wil, maar begin aub niet weer over het feit dat MIJN Top10 je niet aanstaat ofzo.

Nog even over deze film. Natuurlijk is het allemaal cliche en natuurlijk heb je er een komiek voor nodig. Maar het mooiste van deze film vind ik toch de achtergrond info. Dit is oa dat Robin zijn bedrijf dit project produceerde en hij en z´n vrouw dus producer waren. Verder heeft zijn vrouw het boek gevonden/aangedragen gekregen en de opdracht gegeven een script ervan te laten maken. Het is gefilmd in San Francisco, daar waar Robin woont...helaas zien we z´n huisje niet voorbij komen, maar het maakt de film wel extra een project van de familie Williams.

Nog 1 ding. De film werd gefilmd vlak bij Broadway (in San Francisco dus) en daar zitten nogal een boel sexwinkels. Het leuke daarvan is, is dat tussen de takes Robin weleens in Doubtfire kostuum die zaken binnen wilde lopen. En dan nog als Doubtfire vragen naar bepaalde videobanden en bepaalde "tools". Robin zei zelfs dat men na zo´n 5 minuten er pas achterkwamen wie het nu werkelijk was LOL.

Trouwens, het adres van het huis is nog de echte lokatie ook. Scheelde me weer een hoop uitzoekerij

Da's al een teken aan de wand.....

Maar het maakt de film er toch niet interessanter op?!

Maar vind je vijf sterren dan niet een beetje veel?

Precies! Wat heb je aan die achtergrondinfo als het een clichefilm oplevert?

Een 3 voor de moeite lijkt mij meer dan genoeg.

Nee.